Mesh of Life

There are only two and a half weeks of school left. And I really feel like I have done very little this semester. Well, let me rephrase, I feel like I have accomplished very little. I have done a lot though. My homework for the most part has been abandoned and neglected the majority of the time. I have been working a lot in the lab. I have been doing SWE stuff (in a semi-untimely fashion). Dog training classes for Gizmo; lots of time spent on training the dog (he rolls over, haha). And I have had some we time with Jared and me time. But I still feel like this whole semester has gone by way too fast. I have too many things to do and not enough time to do them.

I know I've said this before, but I still feel very disheartened with engineering. I don't know if I'd feel different if I were graduating next semester instead of doing a Master's degree, or if I am truly sick of engineering. Maybe I'm just disheartened with school. I don't want to be in school right now. I don't want to be making crap dollars an hour (and being told by the professors that they're doing me a favor to pay me a little above minimum wage). I don't want to be in Utah anymore. Snow, bad drivers, and all around crazy people... Or maybe I just don't want to be in Logan anymore. But then again, looking for a job and transitioning to the "real" world scares the monkeys out of me. I'm afraid that companies won't like me (or maybe I'm just afraid people in general won't like me).

Anyways, getting off of my sob train now. The landlords have come to visit. I am very urked by them... First off, they are supposed to give three days notice before coming (it's in the contract); instead, they gave us three hours notice. Second, they decide to clean the general living areas. This irks me because basically they're letting me know that my cleaning sucks, is second rate, and below their standards. And third, they use our kitchen supplies. Aren't we supposed to ask before we use what's not ours? Oh and another thing... Trekking around the house at midnight thirty trying to find a door that isn't locked just makes me think someone's trying to burglarize the house. And then finally entering the house at one thirty in the morning only to be on the loud side is kind of rude. Opening all doors to different rooms of the house is very noisy and bothersome for those who are trying to sleep. This weekend, I am not a happy camper. But I know they're good people, and we're living in a pretty big place. I'm just wanting to rant right now; it keeps me from ranting in front of people.

I honestly don't know what my future has in store for me, and I'm excited to see it. I'm excited but not quite ready to to enter the work phase of life and leave the school phase. I'm just so sick of the school phase that it's causing me to lose patience and heart. One day, I will look back at this point in life and think it was awesome. But right now, I'm just so sick of the school and homework. It really stinks. And I just want to be somewhere else and not here...